By LIN ZILONG

Traveling to Beijing for the first time? Don’t get caught in, out, or up by cultural shocks. Know how things should - and shouldn’t - be done to ensure your trip is a memorable one for all the right reasons.

Are you tired of brain-grating traffic jams and blaring car horns? Do you need to get somewhere fast? Do you want to get up close and very personal with a hundred or more Beijingers in a tiny, cramped-up zone? If you’ve just started a holiday in the Chinese capital, then saunter up to any of its subway stations (ditie zhan), and jump on the metro. You may need to recruit some local help here - just say “ditie zhan zai nar?” and your friendly native will point you in the right direction. As soon as you see a sign bearing a sort of white arrow encircling the letter B set against a blue background, you’ll know you’re near the entrance (jinkou.)

Beijing’s subway system currently consists of three underground lines and a light rail - but is being expanded greatly before the 2008 Olympics. Line 1 is the original red line. It cuts through the city from west to east, crossing Tiananmen Square, and is now connected to the “Ba Tong” line, which stretches out towards a recently developed part of eastern Beijing. Line 2 is the loop line, which roughly follows the city’s second ring road (er huan lu), and line 13, the light rail, extends to the north.

With its regular services (although it closes far earlier than its European counterparts) and its inexpensive tickets (RMB 3-5), the Beijing Ditie offers the most rapid mode of commutation in this traffic-strangled city. But though it is convenient and speedy, it is truly comfortable only during its very early or late hours of operation. Even queuing (paidui) for the tickets can be a difficult experience, particularly during busy hours.

Between the hours of 5:30 and 22:30, a daily total of 1.5 million people piles through the subway gates, but this figure can hit 2.7 million on busy days. Upon reaching the ticket booth (shoupiaoting), most will impatiently line up and wait their turn. Don’t be surprised, however, if you are shouldered out of the way by an eighty-year-old grandmother.

You buy your ticket (piao) from a lady behind a glass screen, and it’s best if you have the correct change in hand at the time. Handing over an RMB-100 note will only result in glares from people on both sides of that screen. Then, ticket in hand, proceed to the subway entrance and pass it on to the lady in the blue suit with yellow stripes. She is there to take your strip of paper, rip it apart and fling it into a bin. If you walk past without handing her the ticket, she’ll chase you down the stairs. But don’t overly worry about this needless complication - it provides a lot of jobs.

The station map is written in both Chinese characters and pinyin. This facilitates the foreign eye, and makes it easy to work out which track you should wait at. Before the train pulls up, you’ll see crowds of people standing on or behind a long yellow line, to keep them safe from the passing train. Subway security guards (ditie bao’an) are present in number to ensure that this rule is obeyed.

As soon as the train halts, the guards step back, and all hell breaks loose. Swarms of people jostle to the front of the doorway, effectively blocking the path of those that wish to disembark and by doing so, creating further chaos. People jump off, newcomers jump on, and somehow the body swap is completed within two minutes. Then the doors give a couple of warning slams (though they’re not always heeded), and the train sets off.

Locating a seat is the biggest challenge you’ll face on the subway during busy hours, so if you’re young and relatively fit, it’s probably best not to bother trying. If those on the inside have not snatched any just-vacated seat, there’ll be a mad rush among the newcomers to claim it. Getting involved in this melee may result in injury.

So considering the subway’s speed, it’s no great discomfort to simply stand for the journey. You are also less likely to feel guilty when a heavily pregnant woman or an old lady is left to stand beside you, though some of the strapping young lads on the seats may seem immune to this emotion. If you do stand, though, be careful where you put your hands, however bumpy the ride may be. The handrails are not cleaned as often as they are clasped, and all kinds of bacterial souvenirs remain.

There is no end to the on-board entertainment on a Beijing subway, though it tends to be impromptu rather than of the scheduled variety. Aside from the interesting ads for cigarettes, diamonds or schools with native English-speaking teachers, the general public provides the subway rider with a special brand of comedy. With such a number of stressed-out heads confined in a small space, mid-carriage “arguments” are not uncommon. They capture the attention of the entire carriage, but they are usually episodes of light-hearted urban banter, not ugly or violent incidents. There are plenty of attractive young urbanites, particularly in the summer months, and sometimes there is a musical concert, as a hapless beggar shuffles his way through the crowds singing his sorrows via a microphone and amplifier.

When you arrive at your destination, you’ll need to locate your exit (chukou). There are large maps (shiyitu) at various parts of each station, though in most of them, you’ll need a familiarity with Chinese characters to fathom where you should go. However, each exit is marked bilingually with local landmarks, so if you’re going to a tourist site or the Military Museum, you should be able to pick the right one. Bear in mind, however, that they are sometimes misspelled. If you need to see a doctor, exit through the one marked “General Blospital,” and your ailment will quickly be cured.

At the moment, the subway will only bring you to a limited number of destinations, but by the time the Olympics swings into town, you’ll be able to use it to get to and from any major point of the city, including the airport. By then, Lines 4, 5, and 10 as well as the Olympic Line and the Airport Line will be shuttling passengers all over the city, and the previously uncomplicated Beijing subway map will be more comparable to those of London or Madrid. This should have some impact on each line’s passenger numbers, and it is also expected to ease the capital’s chronic - and worsening - traffic problem. So when you get here, be sure to jump on board, and enjoy the ride.