Men Under Pressure: Re-Employing the Forgotten Generation

By HUA ZI

DESCRIBING his physical and mental state since opening his own architecture firm, Zhang Yubin says: "I have more money, but less hair. My main complaint is feeling constantly tired."

At university Zhang Yubin majored in architecture. In 1996 he gave up his dream of becoming a master architect and resigned from his post at a design institute to start his own firm. His goal: to make more money. "I believe that without money one can do nothing and have nothing to enjoy," he says.

Today's society places unprecedented requirements on men in terms of wealth and career. Following the improvement in women's status, men now feel increased pressure to groom their personal image, consider women's feelings and participate in family affairs. They feel they must be both rich and charming. Some thrive on this high pressure, but others, mostly men over 40, feel left behind.

Zhang's business does a brisk trade, but at a high price. His wife gave up her job at a foreign enterprise to take care of their family, bringing greater pressure to bear on him. He is all too aware that "I am a man, and on my shoulders rest the hopes of two people." Since 2002, Zhang has found himself caught in a vicious cycle. "I cannot stop working. Losing a small project leaves me with a huge sense of guilt. My company has more than 50 employees, and to sustain their confidence in me, I have no choice but work harder and harder." His success has afforded a luxury office and a nice villa, but Zhang feels he has no time to enjoy his family life. "I and the whole of society are changing. People evaluate others using the yardstick of wealth. Everyone owns more, but their quality of life is in decline."

Dong Yunlu was recently hospitalized for a heart attack. He is in charge of receiving and delivering goods for a state-owned foreign trade company. It is a draining job that pays little. Dong says that as he has no university degree, he has to manage on low wages. His options as regards other employment are few. "I regret having been near-sighted and lazy. I should have learned more in the first place," he says. His wife, who works as an accountant and earns twice his salary, often compares him to managers with a university degree who earn much more. This causes fights and greater feelings of inadequacy.

The majority of men in their 40s and 50s were born to poor families. The "cultural revolution" (1966-1976) took place during their school years and many lost the opportunity to receive systematic education. Many of these men lack the skills to cope with the dramatic social changes that have occurred, whereby there is gender equality and more emphasis on individual wealth. Compounding these factors is the concept sociologists call the "Youth Era." According to a sociological theory, society has entered into the "Youth Era," in which the younger generation is more highly regarded than the older generation. Besides feeling rejected by their wives, men also feel generally superfluous.

In view of this, Dong Yunlu sometimes envies the farming life of his forefathers. "They did not need to talk about money and work all the time. Women cooked the meals that they ate together. Nowadays I have to cook for myself on getting home from work."

In early 2003, eight organizations, including the China Sexology Society, conducted a survey on men's quality of life, indicating that China has entered the era of "caring about women and men." The survey encompassed men's sense of happiness, norms of sexual behavior, level of sexual knowledge, sexual prowess, orientation, and interest, frequency of sex, number of sex partners, sex health and psychology, degrees of sexual satisfaction, bad habits, men's occupational injures, and male aging. Among these, health conditions and overall quality of life proved to be the most pressing issues. It seems that following improvements to material life, Chinese men have become frailer, and their health has deteriorated. Owing to environmental pollution, pressure from work and family burdens, men's life quality deteriorates year by year.

As Chen Shengli, director of the Publicity and Education Department of the State Family Planning Commission, points out, "Health refers not only to physiological health, but also psychological health and social endurance." Experts stress that the quality of sexual life is an important factor in men's quality of life, but owing to conservative attitudes, China lacks solid statistics. Starting in 2000, 16 Chinese cities, including Beijing, Shanghai, Guangzhou and Xi'an, conducted activities under the heading "Caring about men's health," and October 28 has been declared "Men's Health Day."

With all the efforts aimed at revitalizing men's roles in society, the hope is that men will relax their high-tempo life and rediscover joys other than making money.

Humor 1. Wife: "I like feminism. I think a modern woman should safeguard her legitimate rights. As to a man's whereabouts, she has the right to know; to his property, she has the right to supervise; when she is broody, she has the right to raise pets..." Husband: "What about a man's rights?" Wife: "He has the right to labor." Husband: "Still, his rights are few." Wife: "He has the right to keep silent." 2. Husband: "The psychology of men and women is actually the same." Wife: "Be more specific." Husband: "They are afraid of the same things. Men are afraid of being penniless." Wife: "And women?" Husband: "They are afraid of men being penniless." 3. Someone asks Old Cool: "What changes does marriage bring to men?" Old Cool: "Marriage makes men disabled. A married man must be blind so as not to see the shortcomings of his wife and the strong points of other women; he must be deaf so as not to hear his wife's inane chatter and the musicality of other women; and he must be mute so as not to criticize his wife and praise other women." 4. Someone asks Old Cool: "What is your feeling about marriage?" Old Cool: "Nothing." "It seems to me that you are well-off." "Really? Just ask my wallet and then you'll know."