The
Middle-Aged: Divorcing a Husband
Tae Kwan Do has become popular among
modern women. |
Suing husbands for divorce now constitutes
the majority of middle-aged divorce cases. Out of a total 500
divorces handled by the Jiang'an District, Wuhan City, from
January to September last year, 417 plaintiffs were women, making
up 82 percent. Among these women, more than 300 have been through
college or higher education.
The main reasons for this age group of husbands
being divorced are: their having had extramarital affairs; their
being good at housework but having no careers; and their relying
on their wives to be breadwinner, acting merely as "lapdogs."
A full 64 percent of the 1,102 divorces handled
by Chongwen District, Beijing, involved women plaintiffs. It
is reported that on hearing that the court would not approve
their divorce petitions, some women committed suicide by taking
large quantities of sleeping pills, or by cutting their wrists.
This shows without doubt that women would rather die than maintain
a loveless marriage, and how firmly resolved they are to divorce
under such circumstances.
Judges in such cases say that women refuse
to buckle under, are more independent, care more about a fulfilling
married life, and so dare to end an unsatisfactory marriage.
About 42 percent of women in these divorce cases had been married
between 10 and 20 years.
Some scholars think that the phenomenon whereby
"it is difficult to be a husband" is social progress.
It indicates how women's economic status, position within the
family hierarchy, and capacity to be independent have all risen.
They no longer depend on a husband, and therefore have higher
requirements of a man's emotional commitment, and accomplishments
in self-cultivation, social status, and wealth.
Many women constantly explore the nature and
laws of marriage, and the characteristics of both sexes, so
as to adjust their mentality to suit changes in sociological
norms, and so become more independent. It is only then that
they can cease to rely on others and lead a healthy life, both
physically and mentally, and take matters such as marriage,
emotions, and sex philosophically. When problems arise in their
married life, they do not just lash out and lose self-control.
It is only by overcoming the "psychological osteomalacia"
suffered by traditionally-minded women that they can come to
terms with the choices they have of divorce and remarriage.
